A Friday Night Date

We’re going out on a date tonight, a rare occurrence these days to be sure.

When we were first married, putting ourselves both through grad school and our first years of teaching, we would have thought ourselves poor. Recently reading Wallace Stegner’s Crossing to Safety, the story of two couples, friends and academics, who start out in Madison, WI (we were in Milwaukee), the professor’s words rang true:

“In a way, it is beautiful to be young and hard up. With the right wife, and I had her, deprivation becomes a game…I set up a card table for a desk and made a bookcase out of some boards and bricks. In my experience, the world’s happiest man is a young professor building bookcases, and the world’s most contented couple is composed of that young professor and his wife, in love, employed, at the bottom of a depression from which it is impossible to fall further, and entering on their first year as full adults, not preparing any longer but finally into their lives.

We were poor, hopeful, happy” (p. 16).

But now looking back, we realize how easy that life really was. The extra money that would come in from time to time would go to nights of entertainment. We could spend the money on ourselves, stretching it as best we could, but free to spend it really how we wished.

Because we can’t afford to go out alone often, we’ve learned our own ways to connect and stay close that do not depend upon the ambiance of a coffee shop, cocktail hour, or art theater. We find each other in late-night gab sessions, early morning quiet, and the comfort of standing, sitting, and kneeling in unison at church pew on Sundays. We also work to create a home that brings a peace that is hard to want to part. And so we get those kids to bed early, tag-teaming, helping whoever finishes first, the world’s fastest rendition of Goodnight Moon. Then, turn the lights down, light candles, crack open a bottle of wine and talk and laugh.

When we miss our season tickets to the playhouse, I pull out our matching copies of Shakespeare or my favorite Restoration Comedies to put on our own production.

When we miss the Symphony, he plays the piece he’s been mulling over on his ride to work.

When we miss gourmet, we make our own.

When we miss those old ways when we so easily let our money slip through our fingers on things which do not last, we do without, knowing we’ve got the far better trade.

Where love is, the sacrifice is real and meaningful but it only hurts a bit, as the words from our favorite David Gray song goes,

“If every window pane should shatter
If every wall should fall apart
Well it might hurt a bit
But wouldn't it matter
With this diamond in my heart

…'Cause we're standing face to face
With the Angel of Grace
And don't it just taste so pure”

This sacrifice has brought with it a life held dearer.

And I believe even happier than when we were that couple, young and free and hopeful, just starting out our lives together. This point has recently proven itself in a new study which shows that marriages are happier with children and the happiness increases with each child had (link from Elizabeth Foss though I can’t find the exact post).

So tonight we go out, not to escape the hardships of a house with young children nor to relive the good old days of the past, not out of fear that if we don’t set up a weekly date night our marriage is doomed to fail, but to enjoy each other’s company and celebrate the abundance of our simple lives.

He’s made the plans, all a surprise other than that I must dress up. I will wait until he comes home to primp, pluck and perfume, knowing how he loves this ritual. I will spend time deliberating on just the right outfit (you know the one with no spit up on the shoulder or finger prints at the knees). All in hoping that he will recognize and delight in the girl he married over 10 years ago. But perhaps, even better, if doesn’t see that same girl, but instead sees

in the deep creases growing across my forehead, a maturity not there before.

in the sprouting gray hairs, a wisdom he needs and turns to often.

in the softer lines of a mother of three, a softer, more giving heart.

in the scars from my past incisions, a life held dearer.

Inexpensive Homemade Christmas Gift--Winter Fun!

Today I made batches of homemade play dough, gave the children my Christmas cookie cutters, and they played and played. After lunch they even asked to play some more!

For the Christmas Season, I add green and red food coloring. For a Christmas smell, I add cloves, cinnamon, and nutmeg and for texture, I add green and green sprinkles. I also leave one batch with no color and the spices turn it brown for making playdough "gingerbread" people.

With flour on sale this time of year, bags of play dough make inexpensive gifts for your children to give to their friends encouraging the spirit of giving without spending too much money. I also like to have some on hand for those who may stop by during this season for a visit or as a hostess' gift for a family Christmas party. Add a fitting cookie cutter to go along with the color and even your favorite Christmas book.

For red, put in a candy cane cutter and The Legend of the Candy Cane. For green, put in a tree cutter and The Give-Away. For the gingerbread dough, put in any of the ginger bread books from Jan Brett. M's favorite right now is Gingerbread Friends! Or Nativity cutters and The Christmas Miracle of Jonathan Toomey.

Here is the recipe we use, the longer you knead it the softer it gets, so let your children play with it, even if it is a gift!

Colored Playdough

Materials

·  1 cup water

·  1 tablespoon vegetable oil

·  1/2 cup salt

·  1 tablespoon cream of tartar

·  Food coloring

·  Saucepan

·  1 cup flour

Directions

1.     Combine water, oil, salt, cream of tartar, and food coloring in a saucepan and heat until warm.

2.     Remove from heat and add flour.

3.     Stir, then knead until smooth. The cream of tartar makes this dough last 6 months or longer, so resist the temptation to omit this ingredient if you don't have it on hand.

4.     Store this dough in an airtight container or a Ziploc freezer bag.

Make-do Monday!

So I've written lots of posts on how much I love our garden. One thing I haven't written about is the temptations I have to buy the accouterments of gardening!

It seems so romantic to garden with a lovely new sun hat, to work with Wellington garden boots on, to use a hand-forged dutch potting trowel when planting a new crop of seeds, to water with a Haws 19th century design watering can, and finally to gather my harvest with this marvelous Maine Garden Hod.



It's an item of beauty...it reveals humanity's gift of engineering and design...it holds the vegetables and not the soil...the vegetables and herbs would taste better...I would look adorable gathering my lettuces with it...And have you ever tried to pick your produce without a basket? It's a pain.

But is it $42.50 necessary? No! Is one of the main goals of the garden to save money? Yes!

How do I make do? I found this basket in the trash at a church on the corner after their last Attic Treasure sale. Wasn't sure how I'd use it then, but now I realized it's just the right size. It has just the right weight. I might not look quite as adorable but who's watching anyway!

This post has been inspired by Ann Kroeker's Make-do Monday Series. She writes:

At Make-Do Mondays, we discuss how we’re simplifying, downsizing, repurposing, buying used, and using what we’ve got.

It’s a carnival celebrating creative problem-solving, contentment, patience and ingenuity. To participate, share your own make-do solution in the comments or write up a Make-Do Mondays post at your blog, then return here to link via Mr. Linky. Enjoy others’ ideas by clicking on Mr. Linky and then clicking on people’s names.

How do you make do?

Homemade Yougurt Experiment

Encouraged by this article in Slate on the cost-effectiveness of making things from scratch (Thanks, Jessica) and confirmed by so many bloggers, I set off to follow this recipe to make Yogurt in the Crockpot.

The results? So So. I now won't say a complete failure. It was a simple recipe, cheap and healthy. Best of all was the flavor. But the consistency was just wrong. It never thickened up. I tried straining it through cheesecloth but it all poured right through.

However, the kids have loved it in their cereal and a friend recommended using it to make smoothies so it hasn't been a complete flop.

So I think I'll try it one more time. However, I'm now adding a yogurt maker to my Amazon Wish List. Family, my birthday is August 9th! I'm sure it's right up there with the Rain Barrel and Worm Bin and all the other things I really want but no one will ever buy me! I've been working my husband for Mother's Day or our 10 year anniversary this June too. True Love.

In the meantime, any ideas, yogurt makers? I've read about using whole milk, gelatin, powdered milk?

Making Square Foot Beds and this week in our garden

Well, I can't take much credit for the building of our Square Foot Beds in the back yard since I was hit with a terrible stomach flu the day they were made! We were blessed to have some of RJ's students over to help and I vaguely remembering wandering out once to mutter something about keeping the soil moist as they mixed it, getting strange looks, and going back to bed.

But I can tell you the book (All New Square Foot Gardening by Mel Bartholomew) has very detailed instructions on making the beds, the right soil, seed sowing, plant spacing and more.

The Boxes:

We bought 2 pine 2x6 lumber boards for each bed, sawed them in half, and used a drill to attach them with wood screws. We then laid down Weed Block so we didn't have to dig out the grass. The beds were filled with our own version of Mel's Mix.

Here is one cost-comparison for making the boxes. For those who think just planting seeds is ambitious, you can buy the boxes here.

The Soil Mel recommends:
* 1/3 Peat Moss – available at any garden center or supermarket. It expands to double its size in the bag
* 1/3 Vermiculite – Buy the coarse grade in large 4 cubic-foot bags at any garden center.
* 1/3 Compost – Buy bags of it at the garden center to get started, but make your own as soon as possible.

We decided to skip the Vermiculite after talking with our local gardening center expert. It was expensive and he said it really wasn't necessary. For compost, we did purchase a few bags of different types of compost/manure since Mel recommends using 5 different types, but we mainly used free compost from our local county, which saved us a bunch of money. We hope to stock up so that for the rest of the season we won't have to buy compost. And maybe, just maybe, by the end of the summer, we will have our compost heap going!

The book explains that such rich soil should not need any fertilizer so we will wait and see. But we will use organic fertilizer if we have too.
I like Organic!

The Grid:

The beds are then divided into square feet. We used Wood Lathe Board (they come 4 feet long!) and followed the plant spacing guide in the book and found on one easy page on Emily's site at My Square Foot Garden. (What I also loved about Emily's site this Spring was getting her emails about when to plant. After you determine your color based on your hardiness zone, she will send you weekly emails about what to plant when!)

Lettuce and Spinach-4 to a square!

Plant Spacing:

Emily explains plant spacing in this way:

"To calculate how many plants per square, look on the back of the seed packet–totally ignore the row spacing, just look at the plant spacing:

• 3″ apart (or less), plant 16 per square
• 4″ apart, plant 9 per square
• 6″ apart, plant 4 per square
• 12″ apart, plant 1 per square"

Chard seedlings, 4 to a square

Peas, 9 to a square

The Cages:

The cages were made with 1x2 inch pine lumber boards, cut and attached in the same way as the boxes. We used our staple gun to attach the chicken wire to the frame. We bought 1" chicken wire which was difficult to work with, but we figured it only had to be done once and would ensure that even the tiniest of bunnies couldn't get in!

The cages were sturdy enough that on frosty nights I could throw a blanket over to protect the seedlings.

Location of boxes:

1. Close to the house for convenience.
2. Pick an area that gets 6-8 hours of sunshine a day.
3. Stay clear of trees or other structures that may shade the bed.
4. The area shouldn't puddle after a heavy rain.

Vertical Frames:
One last catch to growing lots of vegetables in one 4x4 plot is growing plants up. We still don't have our vertical frames but our peas are so big that we need them soon. I'm not exactly sure if we will try to build our own, just use trellis or purchase frames. I'll update next week!

So I hope that shows that even if you have a small backyard like us you can still grow lots of veggies!! It's not too late to start now!

The Simple Life: Homemade Laundry Detergent

I've had a few friends ask for my homemade laundry detergent recipe so I thought I'd post it here to share with everyone. It's just another small step to being frugal, healthy, and self-sufficient. It's fun to make with kids too. They like to watch the soap melt and then see it gel as it sits.

I've used this recipe for about 6 months now and it's been great. Clothes come out clean and smelling fresh. And it's so cheap--it calculates to less than $.01 a load! You also know that it's free from the chemicals and toxins that are store-brand detergents, even the supposed "free and clear" kinds.

Homemade Laundry Soap

1/3 bar Fels Naptha or other type of pure soap, such as Ivory.

½ cup washing soda

½ cup borax powder

~You will also need a small bucket, about 2 gallon size~

Grate the soap and put it in a sauce pan. Add 6 cups water and heat it until the soap melts. Add the washing soda and the borax and stir until it is dissolved. Remove from heat. Pour 4 cups hot water into the bucket. Now add your soap mixture and stir. Now add 1 gallon plus 6 cups of water and stir. Let the soap sit for about 24 hours and it will gel. You use ½ cup per load.

I found the original recipe with detailed directions, pictures and tips at the bottom. I used an Ivory Soap bar and my hand blender to mix it all up after it had gelled. I mix it and keep it in 5 gallon paint bucket with a lid.

Let me know if you have any other questions or if you give it a try!

Our Square Foot Gardens

I was delighted to receive an email from a friend requesting more information about our raised garden beds! Though my husband grew up on a farm, it was huge with at times over 1000 head of cattle and 4000-5000 acres of grain. If you grew up in Jersey, it's hard to imagine that magnitude. They always had a vegetable plot with potatoes, cabbage, and onions but he was out with the animals or out with his gun hunting gophers (but most likely, out with a book!!). So the little plots we've had over the years have been mostly trial and error.

After reading All New Square Foot Gardening by Mel Bartholomew, I realized we were trying to garden for one family like farmers do to feed hundreds and there was so much wasted in the process--seed, soil, water, time and money.

So I hope this answers some of your questions, Melissa!

RJ and a few of his college students put our boxes together! They were inexpensively and quickly made. We didn't want to invest too much money because we don't have that much and weren't sure this was how we'd always want to use the space.

The boxes are wonderful for those who don't have a huge yard but even if we ever have a larger yard the boxes still make sense. Here's why:

1. Being only 4x4, you can easily sow and tend from any spot rather than walking up and down long rows. You never walk on the soil! This is especially nice with little children. The raised beds keep kids out of the garden but they can also reach all spots if you do want them to help. G. is in charge of watering! We give her a big bucket of water and a little cup (recommended in the book) and she diligently waters every square!

2. There is little wasted space, thus you don't need all that wasted water, seed, soil, and fertilizer with long rows. You save money on all those things too.

3. Since it is so compacted with no rows, there is very little weeding! Something I hate to do, I can get the motivation to plant and water, but weed--ugh!

4. We could put time and money into making our own soil mix b/c it wasn't such a huge plot. It took us years at our old house to improve the soil and we started right on the very first day, so we hope that this will help us keep our garden organic!

5. My mind works well in the grid. It was fun to plan what would go in each square and when it is harvested what vegetable will go next.

6. I hope they will look pretty:-)With a mix of flowers, lettuces, pepper plants all together blooming and growing at different rates, especially since a normal garden with rows would take up half the yard.

7. We're also using them to create a sense of enclosure for a sitting area/fire pit. Though they are still pretty bare now so we'll have to wait a few more weeks to show you what we're going for!


8. Our neighbors have had problems with rabbits and especially squirrels who can jump and climb over fences and destroy all their harvest. With small beds, we could easily create cages which we hope will keep out even the smartest pests! And the cages double as weather protection. One frosty night, I covered them with sheets to keep them nice and warm. For hail, you can cover them with a tarp. But then when they aren't needed, the cages are light weight and easy to store.

9. No digging or using herbicide to kill existing grass/weeds! With beds raised above ground, we just laid down a weed cloth and filled the dirt in on top. The book now recommends that the beds only be 6 inches deep, anything else will be wasted.

10. Well, I can't think of a 10th reason! But I'll post more on how to create the beds and how to grow so much in such little space.

If you want more info, Mel has his own site. And here's a YouTube clip:

Hanging Cloths to Dry

Now that it is so warm out, I've been motivated to hang clothes on the line to dry. We don't have that great of a system but the savings of money and energy make it worth it to me. (I've read estimates that the dryer can cost around $.50 an hour to run.)

The other great perk to line-drying is that the sun is a natural bleaching agent to whiten up your cloth diapers and wipes!

It's also a lovely reason for me to get outside with the kids and somehow my busyness keeps them occupied on a task too. Today they were spiders creating a huge web (mess of rope)! And hopefully, we will all nap better too!

Gathering Fruit

Well, I have been a quiet blogger these last few days. Now that Easter season is here it is good to enjoy the fruits of the labor of Lent. Not that prayer and penitence end but I have found that the seasons of the church year are much like the season in nature: there are necessary times of dormancy and husbandry which bear forth into growth and harvest.

Rather than the more sober Lenten practices seeking God, we've been spending time enjoying the blessings of His earth, gathering in the fruits of discipline and husbandry.

And so with good weather and a spirit of resurrection, we been doing lots of this:













ALMIGHTY God, who hast blessed the earth that it should be fruitful and bring forth whatsoever is needful for the life of man, and hast commanded us to work with quietness, and eat our own bread; Bless the labours of the husbandman, and grant such seasonable weather that we may gather in the fruits of the earth, and ever rejoice in thy goodness, to the praise of thy holy Name; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen. (1928 BCP)

A Splendid day at home-making baby food!

It is a cold but bright winter day here. Perfect for getting a project done. I was blessed with a visit from my sister-in-law and her 7 month old baby.

Together we made huge batches of baby food. It was so much more fun with a friend. Instead of seeming like drudgery, we chatted and one of us was always able to keep things going if the other had to stop to feed a baby or wipe a bum!


We made all of Baby C.'s first foods: butternut squash, sweet potatoes, carrots, and applesauce. After cooking and pureeing them, we put them into ice cube trays to freeze and then I will pop them out into freezer bags for individual servings.

To serve, just defrost the number of cubes needed in the microwave.

So easy and will save us so much money and time. Now that's splendid!

Baby C. is a messy eater!